of course there are these days,

i just can't stay in,

and i leave the house,

lock the door,
run down the stairs,
never want to get back.

wandering in the roads ,with friends
and then alone,

sit in the front window of a coffeeshop
watching the people passing by

running in the arms of other people,

crying,laughing,yawning,

running for the bus,

some walk fast,others really slow.

after a while you leave the cafe
and head the park,

you read a book ,or just lay there watching the trees,doing nothing,
just bonding with the nature for a while

in some intervals you get lonely 

and you call a friend, your mother..
the first person that comes in mind and is reachable,

you speak with them for a little while

then you hang up,

you stand up and start walking again, 

pass the bridge,

and make a small pause to see the swans,

and you start thinking

what it would feel like
to see the one you want to see walking if front of you
at this exact momment,

you get the shivers
and then you get this sudden self insecurity

you shake your head to come back to reality,

you didnt want to shake it

but you did.

anyway

its time to go home, 

you start walking again, 

you take the longest way possible 

to get to the train,

you wander a little more in the streets,
you see people,

but you dont want to talk so you dont look them in the eyes,
you walk down the stairs,
get in the train and sit
you see your face
in the mirroring windows of the train
as the lights fall on it,
forming different patterns,and angles
and you get frustrated
because you dont really
like what you see
but anyway
you know that beauty must die,
you exhale loudly,
with a pain in your heart
you finally get back home,
and you take of your clothes,
you sit in the brown couch
you light a cigarette
and you play ''some girls are bigger than others''
it was a nice day